I would like to think that life is more than 'relationshits', I don't think I will ever be ready. Does anyone realize the pain goes so deep I have not even attempted to date someone since?! It has been almost four years... how can one man determine how I judge them all ?... God, I hate you.
Don't get me wrong there have been those I want (real bad) but I always push them away or just don't even bother trying. ...Okay, now I fucking despise you with an unholy passion.
Okay 'S' , where does this put you? Something tells me, you don't even know what you want, am I right? and because of this I will not pursue.. which is sad because I think you and I have great potential and to tell you the truth, I am sick of being the one who always makes the first move, but it goes deeper than that. I have a lot of skeletons and I do not think it is even worth it anymore. Everyone knows the only thing that keeps me here is 'Phi'.
Maybe this is why I cannot resist an older (academic) man, they have already achieved the big goals and know what they want out of life. I find that sexy.
I do not want this to sound like one big rant, I am just feeling so alone, I am one of those fucked up weirdos who hates (for the most part) sex and would just rather cuddle, telling people that tends to scare them away ( if they haven't already , when I tell them I am a single mom).
I do not want this to sound like one big rant, I am just feeling so alone, I am one of those fucked up weirdos who hates (for the most part) sex and would just rather cuddle, telling people that tends to scare them away ( if they haven't already , when I tell them I am a single mom).
Please all I can do to explain it all, is not in my horrific words, but that of 'Disturbed'-'Haunted'
You're broken, so am I
I'm better off alone
No one to turn to and nothing to call my own
Outspoken, so am I
Explosive words that your world wouldn't understand
Turn away again
You're beaten, so am I
I've got a heart of stone
No medication
Never will I be welcomed what has taken hold
You're hurting, so will I
When I awake and remember why I've been running from your
World
Dishonored by your world
Your world
I'm haunted by your world
My blood is cold as ice
Or so I have been told
Show no emotion, and it can destroy your soul
Another sacrifice
To a tormentor your world wouldn't understand
Turn away again
You're angered, so am I
A thousand fires burn
A land of darkness from which I cannot return
You're aching, so will I
When I awake and discover that I have been damaged by yourWorld
Dishonored by your world
Your world
I'm haunted by your world
(Never will I be welcomed
Amongst the heartless monsters you surround yourself with
Feeding off the pain and misfortune of others
A maniacal unit of sub-human parasites
Warped into a feeding frenzy with the smell of fresh blood
Open your eyes and see the creatures for what they are
A swirling mess of hatred and envy
Don't be naive enough to think you're unaffected
The conversion has already begun...)
You're frightened, so am I
A world of demons wait
Watching the movements and filling my heart with hate
You're burning, so will I
When I awake and discover how I have been ravaged by yourWorld
Dishonored by your world
Your worldI'm haunted by your world.
1 comment:
okay, I wont tease you anymore. Or the dork :(
I am sorry. I thought you were feeling a bit better four years later, but I DO understand, all things in their own time.
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